I guess I should write this down before another year goes by and I forget it all completely.
I wasn't sure what type of birth I wanted when I first found out I was pregnant. I only vaguely thought my two options were 1. all natural or 2. water breaks, hilarious car ride to the hospital, cursing/pushing, aaaand baby (movie style). I ran into Leslee, an old friend, and after I told her I was pregnant she offered to be my doula. Even though I wasn't totally sure what that meant I said, "of course!" Then went home to Google it and realized how lucky I was to have this offered to me. It was a perfect way to have a baby that I wouldn't have otherwise known about.
Over the last few months of pregnancy Will and I met with Leslee and her husband Dan. Leslee explained how it would all go down and asked if we had questions, we said no. I was still working at Quarter Moon full-time. By the time late May rolled around and my due date of June first was in sight I was huge and sweating and really emotional. Now, really emotional for me means acting totally normal and bottling everything up until I explode in an embarrassing and untimely outburst of emotion. Retail customer service isn't exactly the best job to have when this type of outburst happens... I'll just leave it at that.
I took the last week of May off and tried to enjoy doing nothing around the house. It was hard to relax and sit still, I felt anxious and guilty for not working. June first rolled around and nothing happened. Nothing continued to happen for the first week of June, I was so crazed with anticipation. My doctor scheduled me to be induced on June 8th, a full week late, his standard procedure. I knew that technically I did not want to be induced because I did not want the drugs but by then I was too amped. I just wanted the waiting to be over.
The night of June 7th, I went to bed and asked the big baby in my belly to please, PLEASE, come on your own, come on tonight or tomorrow before the induction. I woke up around 7am the next morning and I had cramps. I couldn't believe it, I immediately started timing them and they came and went between 6 and 12 minutes apart. I called Leslee, she said great this means you are starting labor, no need to be induced. I called the doctor to let them know I had started labor so they could cancel my appointment. They asked me to come in at 4pm anyway, just so they could check me out.
All checked into the hospital with Will and my sister Hannah. A few hours later my mom arrived and Leslee came up to the hospital too. We all thought I would be able to leave and labor at home. The doctor came in and said they wanted me to stay the night because there had been a slight dip in the heart rate during the monitoring and so, that was that.
By 10 pm we had all eaten pizza and I was having really mild contractions. The exciting kind that you can feel just enough that you know things are actually happening but you can still carry on a conversation. Everyone left to go home. By 11:30pm my contractions started getting serious. I had a hard time breathing and the nurse had to tell me to calm down and (again) assured me that I would probably like an epidural. No thank you. The doctor came in, assuring me I didn't know what I was getting in to, don't I want to reconsider an epidural. No thank you. The nurse then pulled Will aside and told him he needed to TELL me to get the epidural. ha! No thank you.
Leslee came back to the hospital. Sweet Leslee, 8 months pregnant at the time, up all night helping me. I was able to zone in and out during my contractions all night long. Will kept up with my water and Leslee massaged my legs. I progressed up to about 7cm and around 7am we decided to break my water, certain that everything would happen fast after that. Wrong. A couple hours later, the nurses were concerned that I would not be able to progress further without Pitocin. Finally, I burst into tears and there was some cursing about how I really couldn't believe they were still telling me I needed drugs. NO THANK YOU. After that, the nurse said fine, then you need to get out of this bed. The rest is kind of a blur.
Out of the bed, into the shower, that was great for about 2 minutes. Out of the shower onto toilet. Worst pain of my life. Quotable moments include:
"Why won't she COME OUT OF THERE"
and
"What could possibly happen next"
Nice, right? So I'm on the toilet completely naked, totally miserable, I'm certain it will never end and all I can do is scream at the top of my lungs during each horrible crushing contraction. Will and Leslee are standing close, the nurse is sitting close. The nurse walks to me, puts her hand to check and slams the emergency cord. I'm hustled to the bed, nurses rush in. I totally black out at this point but I'm told I pushed 4 times and she was out. Will shakes me on the shoulder and I'm back, he says "baby, look..." and there is a crying baby being held up in front of me.
A true wave of emotion washed over me and the pain disappeared. Bowie was laid on my chest and it was over. The mess happening all around me faded away and I could smile and see straight and feel the weight of this tiny person on my chest. She looked at me. It was amazing.
Bowie Philomena Galotti was born at 11:45am June 9th, 2010
8lbs 3oz
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